Guys, if there’s one thing I learned through my ridiculous week-long effort to get back to the UK after being stranded by volcano ash madness, it’s that no mode of transportation or queue for said mode of transportation is complete without access to some sort of booze. The only tolerable part of the last 38 hours of travel was the ferry across the channel because there was a bar, while the rest of the debacle was mainly pain and suffering. So take note, sports fans.

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